Anyone who's read this 'blog for any length of time knows I am a advocate for responsible parenting. They also know I am a proponent of leaving family planning matters squarely between parents and God. I do not think this is, in and of itself, an irresponsible way to craft a family, believing as I do that God can be trusted to send us the family we are meant to have.
With that said, after reading reports about the California woman who just gave birth to octuplets, I have to question whether she overrode the divine plan and took matters into her own hands.
I am grateful all the babies are doing well. This is NOT about them, their worth, or their value to the world. This IS about a medical industry that is apparently highly unregulated and a woman who I suspect did not try to seek out higher wisdom before allowing herself to be artificially inseminated, a practice that often results in higher order multiple births.
While I commend her for electing to carry all the babies -- usually doctors advise "selective reduction" of embryos once conception has taken place -- I have to wonder why on earth she chose this route in the first place. I have to shake my head at the physicians who thought she was eligible for fertility treatment.
She already has six children ages 7 to 2 to care for.
She is not married. She filed for bankruptcy sometime back, unable to pay more than $900K in debt, mostly on two houses she owned. She is living with her parents in a very modest home that no doubt cannot accommodate fourteen children for long. Her grandmother is quoted as saying the woman has always loved and wanted lots of children.
That's fine. I've always loved and wanted to see the pyramids in Egypt. I've always loved and wanted to own my own bookstore. I've always admired and wanted a large family.
The first I will likely never do becuse I'm not willing to risk my life as a tourist in the Middle East. The second I won't do because I don't have cash-in-hand and I don't want to go into debt to get it. The third is up for grabs but has obvious biological limits attached. I am not inclined to humanly override those limits.
In short, trying to get what we want should never trump the wisdom to accept and use wisely what we need.
Large families like the Duggars of Arkansas or the Jeubs of Colorado have a distinct advantage over the woman in California. They have the stability and support of marriage, they are all professed and active believers in a God Who supplies all need (a mindset that calls down security and blessing of a different sort), they are all self-sufficient with family-based businesses and without government assistance. Both families are financially responsible for their debts and, in fact, live largely debt free.
I wish the California woman and all her children only the best. The babies are here now and it does no good to point a critical finger at them. We don't know their futures, their ultimate purpose or contribution and it's not for anyone to say.
I do hope, however, that the mother will lean actively on God rather than the state to help her raise these children, that she'll consult His higher wisdom in making decisions for their health, safety, and emotional lives, and that the doctors responsible for the procedure that put a mother of six young children and eight unborn babies at great risk will have their licenses yanked for good.
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